Search

Awakening of Ann

Welcome to my soul & mind

Tag

writer

The Tables Turned

I used to look at depressed people
With confusion
Not understanding why
How could someone be so depressed?
How could someone cry so much?
How could someone wallow in their pain for so long?
It is truly pathetic
But now I find myself on the other side
Drowning in my own salty tears
I have become someone I ridiculed
There is so much to be grateful for
So much had gone so right
Everything feels like it’s crashing
Like a plane high in the sky
heading full speed downwards
I just have no idea how I got here
I never saw this coming
I didn’t think I would be crashing like this again
I said goodbye to the sad lonely girl long ago
Embracing all the good things in life
Appreciating the most simple things in life
Yet the darkness seeped back into my soul
Capturing me with it’s deathly grip
Now I am dreaming I am satan himself
Wandering aimlessly through life
Hoping & Praying to God
I’ll stumble onto where I belong
Stumble onto my Purpose
Something I used to think I had all figured out
I was a brave one
Brave & Stubborn & Determined
Nothing was getting in my way
It was either my way or the highway
I overcame every obstacle
Anything I wanted…
I always went in & got it
I was confident & focused
I knew what I wanted
I knew where I was going
And no one was able to tear me down
Somewhere along the way
I fell
I fell so hard…again & again
To the point where I just laid on the ground
Defeated …curled up in a fetal position
Incapable of looking in the mirror
I became a shell of myself
The person I used to be
Not everyone is the angel they seem to be
And not everyone is the devil
I guess it’s time to swallow my pride
Not that there is any left…

Love

What an interesting concept?

How two creatures could feel such a longing for one another

To feel the warmth of another’s body

To gaze into the depths of another’s soul

Whispering sweet nothings

Immersing oneself into the sweetest pleasures on Earth

Conquering her Heart

Entering her sacred temple

Their minds go blank

Collapsing & gasping for air

Trying to hold on to this feeling forever

Sweet Embraces

 

 

 

My Life

Words sizzled through my heart

The way a cigarette burns through flesh

What is life like?

When you pushed away everyone who was good in your life

Subconsciously sabotaging relationships for a mysterious underlying issue

When you pushed away your family to a breaking a point

When your friends don’t know what is going on

Because you’re too afraid to trust anyone

Because you’re too afraid they will judge you

In the end, that is what they all do anyways

When you lied your entire life

So no one believes you when you are actually telling the truth

Maybe it is time to stand on my own two feet again

And you realize all the games people played you with

When you realize you were simply just part of a cruel game

I’m going back in time right now

Trying to pinpoint the exact moment when everything went wrong

I guess there isn’t a single point

Some things just slowly happen before you realize

I don’t even know what goes on in my head anymore

The most fucked up thing about this

Is I know I created this world for myself

I don’t want to lose everything…

 

 

 

 

FullSizeRender-18.jpg

fullsizerender-13

Support

FullSizeRender-11.jpg

Love Story

The years went by

Their youthful faces began disappearing

The zest for life began to fade

The monotony of life got to them

They slept farther apart in bed

They became strangers in the same house

The twinkle in her eyes had vanished

There were no more flowers…no more celebrations

The dinners grew quiet

It was so evident in their faces….that everything  was lost

That nothing could be repaired

The passion had died down into ashes

The house became empty

The lives they created became wrapped up in themselves

Their little ones had flown from their nest

Nothing was left but silence

However time had continued…

And a word was never spoken

They stayed together out of fear

Fear of being alone

Fear of breaking the hearts of their little ones

Death had dawned upon them one day

It came without warning

It came into the dark of the night

Their lives seemed to vanish in a blink of an eye

I witnessed all of it

I saw them dying in front of me

No one understood that she was a living corpse

She hated her life, she hated her husband, she hated her kids

Yet she fulfilled her role in society

He always wanted more in life

Yet she always seemed to hold him back

Drowning his dreams into her fears

She killed his aspirations

So he was never able to reach his destination

And that was their story

So I promised myself I would never commit to anyone for the rest of my life

Afraid I would become a part of the same story

 

 

 

FullSizeRender-7.jpg

FullSizeRender-6.jpg

Blog at WordPress.com.

Up ↑