Awakening of Ann

Welcome to my soul & mind



My Life

Words sizzled through my heart

The way a cigarette burns through flesh

What is life like?

When you pushed away everyone who was good in your life

Subconsciously sabotaging relationships for a mysterious underlying issue

When you pushed away your family to a breaking a point

When your friends don’t know what is going on

Because you’re too afraid to trust anyone

Because you’re too afraid they will judge you

In the end, that is what they all do anyways

When you lied your entire life

So no one believes you when you are actually telling the truth

Maybe it is time to stand on my own two feet again

And you realize all the games people played you with

When you realize you were simply just part of a cruel game

I’m going back in time right now

Trying to pinpoint the exact moment when everything went wrong

I guess there isn’t a single point

Some things just slowly happen before you realize

I don’t even know what goes on in my head anymore

The most fucked up thing about this

Is I know I created this world for myself

I don’t want to lose everything…





I refuse

To obey the laws of society

To accept everyone’s standard of beauty

To sign my life away with a contract

To enslave myself with a 9-5

To change myself to fit your beliefs

To settle for mediocrity

To let you steal my dreams

To believe everything the government says

To swallow every pill a doctor prescribes

To think the love of my life doesn’t exist

I refuse

Far away…

As I gaze upon the constellations in the midnight sky…

I think about my destination & I start to cry…

Because it all seems so far away…

And these dreams have ceased to fade away…

And all i can think about is a love lost long ago…

While laying here on the grass feeling this warm breeze blow…

Wishing upon a star…

Just one more time

I am a murderer

I am a murderer

A killer of our dreams

Our Hopes

Our Goals

Our Aspirations

I assassinated them in the broad daylight

With more than kisses & hugs

Accustomed to your voice..that’s all I know

Accustomed to your absence

But basked in your love

Forgive me & this lustful sin

I miss you



Escaping the dark depths of reality & immersing myself between pages of enlightenment

An orgasm of an epiphany

Carefully calculating the destination of the ejaculation of my thoughts…

Into the stratosphere of human consciousness…

Giving life to unspoken words & unkept promises

The mind then drifts away back to a graveyard…

Collecting the shards of dreams that never experienced manifestation

Looking behind the present…

Watching the verge of climax before heartbreak occurs..


Or simply diving into dark depths of a different reality?

She’s Dangerous

She could break your heart
Like no one ever has before
Look into the depths of your soul
like she owns you
Walk on by
like she never met you
After making love endlessly
She can turn off her emotions
Like a switch
Make you question your very existence
Bring you on the verge of alcoholism
She hurts so bad
But shell never show it
To you she’s a cool cat
Too cool to fall in love
Little do you know
She’s begging for someone to conquer her
To melt her frostbitten heart
But she just cant seem to let you
Too scared to open the door
But to you
You think she just doesn’t care
And you’ll try to move on
Intoxicating yourself every night
Not knowing she hates herself
For not letting you see
The vulnerable baby she really is
Wishing she could go back in time
To appreciate your love all over again

A woman…

She is strong…not in a masculine way

But realizes the power that resides within her femininity

She is gracious & humble

Never afraid of being wrong

She is alluring

There is a certain atmosphere she creates whenever she walks into a room

She is beautiful

Even looking beyond her bosom & curves…

She is radiant with love

Because she has learned self acceptance

She is & always will be


Left with no answers

Left with a broken heart

Not knowing why

A damsel in distress

The knight in armor caused havoc

Then one day he came back for her

But she was no longer the same

Since she had to fight battles & win wars all by herself

Left with scars

Left with no tears

Nothing left but cold bitterness

Experienced realms of this world she could have never dreamed of in her nightmares

And he was never there…

Occasionally reappeared but always seemed to disappear

Now you want her to be a part of a kingdom you created

Why now?

Where were you when I needed you?

When I laid all by myself in a river of sorrow…

I can only wish you the best

A kingdom I could never be a part of

Afraid you’ll disappear tomorrow

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