It kills me to know
To know that you’re with her
To know that she has you
That you put a ring on her finger
And not mine
To know that you two share a bed
That you two share a home
That she wakes up to you every morning
And gets to look at your handsome face
And feel your love
Your warm embrace
Yet your love always flickers
She’s the one that shares a life with you
A life that I’ll never have with you
Because you’ll never leave…
Because shes just that easy
And shell stay no matter what
And here I am in my own bed
Alone
Left with the memories of you here
Of the love we shared
Of the lies you told me
And yet I can’t stop thinking of you
And I hate myself
For missing you so
Im yearning for you
And I fight myself everyday
To not reach out to you
Because theres a part of me that wants to hold on
Hold on dearly
Hold on tightly
To the love I thought you had for me
To the man I thought you were
The grand man you painted yourself to be
You’ve shattered my illusions
You’ve shattered my dreams
The one I had with you
I saw my whole life in your eyes
And it hurts
To know that I was never safe with you
Even though I thought I was
That you set your eyes on me
To break my heart
To feed your ego
To play with my mind
To open up old wounds
The ones I thought I healed
So here…
Lets raise a glass to my solitude
To finding love within myself
To finding safety in myself
To finding peace on my own
To move on in life without you
Awakening of Ann 