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Awakening of Ann

Welcome to my soul & mind

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feelings

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Deception

Her whole life was a lie

She never knew the truth

Lying in a pool of deception

Suffocating in a web she spun herself

Not knowing what was real anymore

Losing her mind

Herself

The ones she loved

Thinking she was protecting them

Thinking she was saving them grief

Thinking she was saving them aggravation

Heartbreak

The only person she was hurting was herself

But that was the only way she knew how to survive

Love…

Loving can hurt…

But I feel not loving can hurt just as much…

To yearn for the light of deep passionate love…

Yet the sunshine never reaches…you only catch glimpses

It is the inability to be vulnerable that hurts…

To watch someone beautiful walk away…

Because you couldn’t open up your heart

But what if we did?

What if we dove so deep in love

Dove into the deepest depths of the heart & soul

Reaching that mesmerizing paradise that glimmers underwater

There we could stay for a while…

Make love all night long

Feel your sweet tender lips..

Feel your sweet gasps for air..

Feel your dainty fingers running down my legs..

i wish I felt it all….

All over again

Please…

Don’t take my silence
As an insult
Don’t mistake my silence
As an attitude
Recognize my silence
As my Inability
To speak without crying
Afraid it’s too much for you to handle
Afraid to say the wrong thing
Afraid you wouldn’t understand
But in truth the saddest thing is to stay in silence
To never speak up
Never knowing if someone would have accepted you
Looking beyond your flaws
Please my dear
Do not stay in silence
I assure you
There is someone out there who understands
As unlikely as that seems
Trust me

Thought I Forgot

Life goes on
That I know
Something that I believed in
But you creep into my thoughts
Trying to replace you
Erase you from my heart
Yet you linger
You come when I least expect it
As if I left the door open for you
If I could just kiss you one more time
I wonder what it would feel like
Would you give me those sparks again
Would you hold me tight
Not wanting to let go
I know I shouldn’t
Keep thinking what if
What if I let myself fall
Fall in love so madly & deeply beyond words
So deep I can’t find myself
Suffocating & drowning in your love
I wish I knew
I wish I didn’t run away
I don’t want to look back
I don’t want to live in the past
Yet you made me feel
I want to feel
I need you to rip my heart out
Just let it burn
Watch the flames engulf my soul, mind, & body
Trying to find you
Trying to find anyone like you
I’m willing to be blinded again
I’m willing to be broken
Just love me & run away with my heart

Her Beauty…

If only we could stop measuring women

By the size of her breasts, hips, or waist….

But by the goodness in her heart…

The Pure Essence of Her Soul…

& The Brilliance of Her Mind…

-C.A.T

The world is in dire need of healing

Do you think if we really knew who we were, that it would be part of a solution?

Our exterior is just a vessel in which our soul resides in…

We need to look beyond the surface…

Thoughts of a MakeupArtist….

I refuse

To obey the laws of society

To accept everyone’s standard of beauty

To sign my life away with a contract

To enslave myself with a 9-5

To change myself to fit your beliefs

To settle for mediocrity

To let you steal my dreams

To believe everything the government says

To swallow every pill a doctor prescribes

To think the love of my life doesn’t exist

I refuse

Far away…

As I gaze upon the constellations in the midnight sky…

I think about my destination & I start to cry…

Because it all seems so far away…

And these dreams have ceased to fade away…

And all i can think about is a love lost long ago…

While laying here on the grass feeling this warm breeze blow…

Wishing upon a star…

Just one more time

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